You can find your match by literally getting on the same wavelength. All matter vibrates, and like matter vibrates at like levels. That is how we hear the radio stations we listen to. You will bypass your ideal mate if you are vibrating at a different level, and you will attract him if you are vibrating at the same frequency.
Emotion is a carrier of vibration, and it propels the kinds of actions you are likely to take. Put yourself in the feeling state of the relationship you intend to attract and anchor it to you by experiencing as many of its attributes as possible.
Manifestation is a multitiered process that involves getting clear about your intentions and the why behind them, i.e. what experience you desire as a result of attracting a particular person or thing into your life. Use the tools above to anchor yourself emotionally and physically into your desired state and thus speed its attraction to you.
Almost three years ago, I attended an unusual cocktail party. A roomful of adults was playing make-believe.
My class of coaching trainees projected ourselves into the future. We were told to pretend that it was one year later, and that we were here to discuss the wonderful things that had happened to us within the past year.
As I paused to prepare for our game, I reflected on my biggest hopes for the future, one of which felt too private to share - almost.
I greeted my friends with enthusiasm exceeding the circumstances, given that we'd been sitting in the same room together all morning. And then I shared my big news.
"I bought a house!" I said, waving my arms excitedly. "It's a beautiful purple Victorian with amazing original architectural details. ...And such great timing, because -- (deep inhale) -- I had a baby!" Asked the baby's name, I blurted the first thing that came to my mind. "Lola!" -- A girl, I thought to myself. How sweet that would be. "And I published a book!" The most important part of the exercise was to really get into the feeling space of those successes, to act "as if," to better draw the energy of those events into our lives. Of course, it felt a bit ridiculous to be telling people that I had published a book right after having a baby, but they were two of my dreams, so I just went with it.
Fast forward one year later. We bought a house, a village colonial which is pretty darn similar to a victorian. It's 100 years old, and has some amazing original details, plus modern touches that I especially enjoy in the winter, like a huge jacuzzi tub and steam shower. It's white with blue shutters. But as of mid-July, it will be painted pale green with cream trim and purple shutters. Two months later, I had a baby girl, Dalia.
Another two years have passed, and on April 1st, the anniversary of our big move, I published The Other Baby Book. I co-authored it with a close friend who I didn't know at the time of the cocktail party. Three years earlier, I would have told you that my book would be about finding your life's calling. And now, looking back, I can appreciate that motherhood has truly been that for me. Of course, it's just one part of what I feel called to do. Coaching is a big part of that as well. But three years ago I never would have told you I would be writing a book about parenting.
Life doesn't always turn out exactly as we plan it. But the good news is, we have the power to make most of our dreams come true. All it takes is getting clear on what we want, and believing that we can have it. Then we can follow the path of our dreams.
Procrastination. It’s pervasive in our society.
Most of us don’t actually want to do what we believe it will take to accomplish our goals.
We use words like “have to” when discussing our resolutions. “I have to drop that last 15 pounds this year!”
Resolutions that start out with “have to” are mostly destined to fail. We don’t have the energy that we’ll need to succeed.
The key is to change the “have to’s” into “want to’s”. If we want to do something, we have the motivation and drive to make it happen.
For that reason, I tend to make resolutions throughout the year, as I decide I want to do things. If I feel I need to do something, but don’t yet want to, I try to find something within it that will make me want to do it. Otherwise, I simply don’t try.
This New Year’s, if you must set a resolution, focus on the why as opposed to the how. Plan to drop 10 pounds? Rather than “I have to lose weight,” focus on “I want to fit into my skinny jeans.”
Then find yourself an accountability partner to make it happen. And check in with them.
Speaking of – it’s time for me to check in with my accountability partner on the Career Bullseye workbook I have in progress. Time to change that “have to” into a “want to!”
Happy New Year, everyone! Go out there and conquer your goals!
I had the privilege of attending the Massachusetts Conference for Women yesterday, along with thousands of other women.
I look forward to this conference every year because it blends inspiration, tools and opportunities to connect with others.
We’ve all experienced good and bad conferences. Bad ones can feel like they’re sucking the life out of you. Some common traits: long sessions, insufficient breaks, and irrelevant or tired material and/or speakers.
When a conference is good, it can be seriously revitalizing. Why is that?
First, a good conference will present speakers who inspire you to challenge your own boundaries.
When we do the same thing day in and day out, it’s easy to predict more of that sameness stretching out into the future.
A good conference will feature at least one – but preferably many – person who has challenged their own (and therefore our) concepts of what is possible, and has achieved greatness.
Why is it so important for us to see successful people?
When we look at others who have achieved greatness, we are reminded of our own limitless potential.
That reminder helps us to stretch ourselves; challenges us to think of ourselves in a more expansive way.
Not so coincidentally, this is also what is so powerful about coaching.
When we set goals that are aligned with our dreams, no matter how impossible they may seem, we bring them into the realm of possibility.
The most inspirational speaker I saw yesterday was Judge Glenda Hatchett. She left each conference-goer with a challenge, which I’ll pass onto you (paraphrased):
Think of one thing you’ve always wanted to do, but have never done. What’s keeping you from doing it? Now get out there and make it happen!
I’m on it, Glenda!
To keep myself accountable, I’ll put it out there and engage my readers to hold me accountable, as a coach would.
I plan to write a book this year. I’ve begun working on The Other Baby Book with my friend Megan. You can learn more at www.theotherbabybook.com.
What’s your goal??