"I'll think it through." How often do we say, hear or think that? In our society, the intellect is king. We are taught not to make emotional decisions, to wait until we're in a rational thinking space, to make sure we've weighed the pros and cons of important decisions. And there is merit to looking at both sides of a decision, being calm and using our brains. But we don't often hear about the drawbacks of making an intellectual decision. Our intellects often process decisions according to other peoples' standards. For example, according to our societal standards, the best job for you might be one where you can earn enough to afford a house in the nicest neighborhood, drive a fancy car and go on vacation each year. But the best job for YOU might be one where you feel inspired, alive and like you're living your true purpose, regardless of the paycheck. What we're not often told is that the mind has a flaw. It works based on past programming, much like a computer. If the software hasn't been upgraded - given different tools for decision making - it will continue to make decisions in the same ways it has in the past. Which may or may not be working for you. It's time to step into a new paradigm of decision making. Leading with the heart. Did you know that the heart has 40,000 neurons? That it can work in close partnership with the brain to share information? We can tap into the tremendous wisdom of the heart by acknowledging it as an authority in our lives. Our heart taps into our core knowing, our body's innate wisdom system, which contains the subconscious information that our brains may have talked us out of believing. For example, our heart will know when a job is not right for us, no matter how good it looks on paper. It will know when a relationship with a given person is in our best interest. And so on. The best way to tap into our heart's wisdom is by re-familiarizing ourselves with our heart space. If you haven't already, try this Heart Opening Meditation. Then, next time you're making a decision, large or small, move your awareness into your heart space. Ask: how would it feel to make this decision? Note your body's reaction. Then: how would it feel to make the opposite decision. Take note again. The heart shares its knowledge with us in many ways, but the most obvious ones are bodily sensations. A feeling of discomfort, panic or unease indicates a poor fit. A feeling of harmony or excitement is a green light, even if there's a bit of apprehension mixed in, as often happens when we stretch our boundaries. The heart isn't a familiar authority to many of us, but once we reestablish our relationship with it, we'll find ourselves in touch with an inner guru to rival the very best minds on the planet. Have fun, and please share your experiences in the comments! <3 I am so excited to share the next stage in my work with you! It is my mission to support people around the world in realizing their potential. I have now launched a youtube channel to share original - and transformational - meditations that can help you conquer your limitations and find inner freedom. Is there a tool or technique you'd like me to share here? Please let me know what you most need in the comments. Thank you! Check out My YouTube Channel! And, as my gift to you, a meditation on releasing stuck emotions. Transition times help us by bringing subconscious assumptions to our conscious minds.
When we make major decisions, it is important to get clear on who we are and what we want to create in the world. This process isn't always straightforward, and the bumpier it is, the more clarity it can bring you, assuming you're up for riding the waves of unexamined beliefs. Our beliefs - conscious or unconscious - shape our actions, which shape our results. So it's important to ask yourself about your beliefs in order to be a more conscious creator of your reality. I'm in the process of deciding with my family what kind of school is best for my children, which is bringing up lots of unconscious assumptions to be evaluated and consciously chosen or discarded. I'll take you through the process of a values decision through the lens of a school choice conversation, so that you can apply it to your own major (and minor) decisions: 1. To get clear, first identify the values that are important to you. For me, the top values are: Respecting others' inner knowing (especially children) Self sufficiency (within a network of interdependence) Respect for nature Cultural lineage and identity 2. Next, prioritize the values in order of importance to you (or your family, partnership, etc) with your top values on top. Mine would look like this: a. Respecting others' inner knowing (especially children) b. Respect for nature c. Self sufficiency (within a network of interdependence) d. Cultural lineage and identity 3. Finally, look at the options you are considering and evaluate how well they match your values. Which option would be most aligned with your top values? You can even assign numerical scores to the options and add them up. (a = 4, b = 3, c = 2, d = 1) School #1: d only = 1 School #2: a, b and c = 9 School #3: a, c, and d = 8 School #4: a, b, and c = 9 Then make your choice. If your gut instincts are not being factored into the number, see what they might have to tell you about this decision. Is there another value that is not being weighed here? Make sure to add it in. |